thefatjewish
thefatjewish

@thefatjewish

Emailio.Addresstevez@gmail You can't get an STD if you never get tested.

  • Posts3 853
  • Followers10,1 M
  • Following420
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
If you're not using your child for internet content, you are seriously fucking blowing it. DRESS THE KID UP LIKE A TINY VERSION OF WALTER WHITE AND GIVE IT BLUE ROCK CANDY THAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE METH YOU'LL GET SO MANY LIKES
  • 9 016
  • 226 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
By my age, my grandfather had lost an arm in a war, built a fucking house with one arm (while drunk on room temperature gin), and had 5 children who called him sir. I keep chicken fingers in the glove compartment of my car, just in case. (Tw: @mutablejoe)
  • 7 771
  • 293 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
This kid will fuck your girl and have a baby with her. HE'S COOL ENOUGH TO BE A KID WITH A KID
  • 7 638
  • 341 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
Under 21 and don't know shit? THIS IS ABOUT HOME ALONE, THE 1990 CLASSIC FILM YOU LITTLE FUCKERS (@sadmichaeljordan)
  • 6 350
  • 370 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
Sean Spicer is definitely a pervert, I would love to see that dude's browser history. Japanese women stuffing squids in their vaginas FOR SURE.
  • 4 093
  • 252 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
PRO TIP: if you sleep with someone and wake up not knowing their name, go to Starbucks together the next morning and let them do the ordering
  • 11,9 K
  • 257 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
Jesus was Jewish, but he knew how to use tools and probably had a big dick, so that shit doesn't make any sense. (@robertmichaelevans)
  • 2 201
  • 309 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
GO TO @SHOPPRIVATEPARTY AND GET YOUR HANDS ON SOME ROSÉ CLOTHES THAT WE MADE, BUY IT FOR A GIRL YOU WANT TO SLEEP WITH OR YOUR LUSH MOM OR YOURSELF OR WHATEVERRRRR. shopprivateparty.com/swish
  • 2 244
  • 50,7 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
I take 3 minutes to pack a fucking suitcase, then 3 months to unpack when I get back home. (@babewalker)
  • 15,4 K
  • 259 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
In the year 2030 you will only be able to get fresh water delivered to you via drone if Lord Bezos and Emperor Zuckerberg deem you worthy to hydrate, peasants.
  • 5 636
  • 289 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
This motherfucker smokes cigarettes in the car with the windows closed and hates rap music.
  • 9 155
  • 232 K
thefatjewish
thefatjewish
People over age 27 talking about books and juice cleanses and international environmental summits and I'm still putting every girl I have sex with in a Dutch oven.
  • 4 406
  • 287 K